Saturday, 31 October 2009
9. Having countless children's parties cancelled at the last minute because of fear of flu.
8. Finding there's still one that wasn't cancelled.
7. Getting roped into going to Tokyo Disneyland with your Japanese friends to "enjoy" the festivities.
6. Orange overload.
5. Discovering you can't fit into the suave dracula outfit you bought, as it's cut for a Japanese salaryman circa 1978.
4. Finding your best Halloween outfit is actually a crotchless pervy little number.
3. Being Japanese and getting stuck with a bunch of obnoxious drunk foreigners in drag on the last carriage of a Yamanote Line train.
2. Being a lone foreigner in your best Halloween outfit getting stuck on the last-but-one carriage of a Yamanote Line train.
1. Having to answer impossible questions, like: "Excuse me gaijin-san, could you tell me the point of Halloween?"
Friday, 30 October 2009
in the driving seat for first time in 30 months American Shogun smart guys leave the majority be your output's only as good as your input, paper tigers folding
Thursday, 29 October 2009
Wednesday, 28 October 2009
Tuesday, 27 October 2009
Monday, 26 October 2009
Sunday, 25 October 2009
The last stand of Our Man will be televised (unless it rains a lot). Reminds Our Man of this:
Right, must rest up, wouldn't want to miss the starting gun...
Saturday, 24 October 2009
Party now, for tomorrow Our Man may die. Yep, what seemed an eternity away when he signed up for it is now upon him - the Half Marathon from Hell* starts at 9am on Sunday, Central Standard Abiko Time.
And Our Man has hardly trained at all these last couple of weeks, although he is right this very moment keepng himself lubricated with a high energy sports drink known in these parts as Suntory Malts, just to keep his body loosened up for the 21km Great Trek round the Abikan Dead Sea.
Before he meets his pacemaker, he would just like to say a hearty thanks to all those kind souls who have donated cash to Our Man's charity to shut him up, but it didn't work. See, there are folk in Africa and such places who still need your help. For every two quid (three bucks or so) you donate on your credit card, a brand new book wings its way to some unfortunate sod who could do great things. Oh yeah? Yeah. Like this chap here who should be all the proof you need of the value of a good old book.
So, if you haven't coughed up some virtual loose change skinflints of the world, do it now, and send it to Our Man's Swiss bank account, er, donation page here. And then Our Man will shut up about it. Probably.
*Also known as the Teganuma Eco Marathon. Really.
Friday, 23 October 2009
Thursday, 22 October 2009
Wednesday, 21 October 2009
Tuesday, 20 October 2009
Monday, 19 October 2009
But don't take Our Man's word for it, see for yourself in this handy (insert town name here) videologue!!:
Sunday, 18 October 2009
By the way, the Rev. Paperboy will return, just wanted to give his holiness a chance to build up a head of steam so we can get a Rules to Live By rule-a-thon going one day soon. Catch his latest, here.
Saturday, 17 October 2009
Friday, 16 October 2009
Thursday, 15 October 2009
You can see why Japan gets a bad name when this is the face they present - to themselves. Is it funny? Our Man admits he was morbidly fascinated by the reactions of the poor chap. If he had known who the chap was, it might have been amusing, but over all it confirms his belief that you are best off switching the telly off. Especially in Japan.
Wednesday, 14 October 2009
Tuesday, 13 October 2009
Monday, 12 October 2009
Lifted from here.
Sunday, 11 October 2009
Saturday, 10 October 2009
Friday, 9 October 2009
10. Yukio: Don't ask if his travel insurance includes health care.
9. Barack: Don't offer to say a few words on behalf of Tokyo 2016.
8. Yukio: Do blame the translators if anyone mentions the America is the great Satan speech.
7. Barack: When Yukio takes you to a swanky sushi restaurant, don't remark that Flipper was your favourite TV show.
6. Yukio: Two words: Peach Cobblers.
5. Barack: When Yukio does his Eddie Murphy impression, just smile politely.
4. Yukio: Why not try your Different Strokes "Watchya talkin 'bout Willis?" impression. That one won't fall flat.
3. Michelle: Don't tell Miyuki, "Your dress is out of this world!"
2. Miyuki: Don't tell Michelle, "We're having a whale of a time!"
1. And all of you, for christsakes - Don't mention the war (Pacific or Afghan)!
Thursday, 8 October 2009
Wednesday, 7 October 2009
In remarks to journalists after his speech, Lord Mandelson said the greatest frustration, “is what is not seen, that invisible hand that frustrates and slows access to Japan’s markets. We know that Japan has been a past practitioner par excellence in operating behind the border barriers that prevent access to its markets.”
He said his impression was that the new government would be more open. “I think there is a growing realisation that for the Japanese economy to maintain its strength, its vitality, its dynamism it needs a greater spur that comes from foreign competition, as well as needing a different economic model that attracts rather than shuns foreign capital and ownership,” he said.
Tuesday, 6 October 2009
Monday, 5 October 2009
Sunday, 4 October 2009
Saturday, 3 October 2009
Our Man: Better read than ever, and he would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you pesky kids
Well, that was, er, exciting? That was Our Man's live tweets, intercepted for your viewing pleasure from here. By the way, this was the build-up:
Friday, 2 October 2009
Er, well turns out Satsuki Eda, the DPJ head of the Upper House, and a couple of his mates have been blowing millions of yen at hostess clubs and then having the barefaced cheek (so to speak) to claim them as legit political expenses (they claimed about $25,000). But don't worry, no taxpayer money was used for this purpose, we are assured by party bigwigs.
Uh-huh. Well, we can take that as gospel then. Money (whose?) well spent. Let's hope they did indeed use their own salary. Oh, wait that would be paid for by us - even us gaijin who can't vote and haven't been to a good hostess club in donkeys' years :(
And what a salary they do get - around $110,000 a year, if Our Man remembers right from Ampontin here - who when he's not berating journos for writing entertaining copy or deleting Our Man's comments, can actually make a good point or two.
OK, the case for the defence:
Thursday, 1 October 2009
Lifted from here.