Tuesday, 15 April 2014

Still life


Our Man just looked up from one of the myriad screens that stare at him through the course of a day and realised that March has come and gone.

You may already have been privy to that nugget of intel.

Our Man has been so adept at maintaining radio silence that he has actually begun to enjoy it. But he wouldn’t want his handlers thinking he was slacking. Far from it. So, a brief accounting of a month in the life of the bunker:

  • First trip back to Blighty for four years. The place is both familiar and strange. The swearing of the youths on the top deck of the bus, the boarded up shops, the obnoxious BMW drivers, these things are comfortingly familiar. The increase in the size of pub food portions are not, though are most welcome. But £3 a pint? ’zounds.
  • Have written, edited and laid out three textbooks for the natives to learn the Queen’s English (even if she is a Hanoverian interloper). Since there’s no sterling left in the kitty for an artist, Our Man commandeered a 4B pencil, some paper and a YouTube instruction feed and illustrated them himself too. It’s amazing what you can do once you decide you’re not afraid of making mistakes. (I can see from your artwork, you are quite fearless – Ed.) 
  • There’s a new bunker in town. Our Man has moved the cover life business out of the existing bunker into a more accommodating residence. It even commands a perfect view of Abiko’s best ¥100 emporium. Though the new bunker does appear to be infested with lizards. Still, better than Hanoverians.
  • Speaking of lizards, a number of Britishers (two in fact) said that the were getting intel for the first time in decades to invest in Japan. Well, what was Our Man to say? Abe’s the Man? Stop reading Murdoch papers? Our Man took the honest option and shrugged his shoulders. Can’t honestly see any change in Japan’s prospects, but maybe the rest of the world is in worse shape. Our Man doesn”t know. All he can see clearly is the 100-yen shop, so what would he know?